Date: April 17, 2015
Can anyone justify that shouting your wife is a good thing? There is never a justifiable reason to shout at your wife in private or public place. Shouting is an immature, ridiculous and ineffective act. It can only provide undesirable hurting results. When tying the knot in Islam you are officiating your marriage. You are the only responsible person to keep her happy and healthy. Life is a give and take policy. If a husband is wrong in any of the means, wife is the person to correct him and vice versa. Be genuine and honest each other. Allah teaches us that man should keep his wife happy and lead a wonderful life with prayers and thanks giving.
"The best of what a man leaves behind are three: a righteous child who supplicates for him, ongoing charity the reward of which reaches him, and knowledge that is acted upon after him."
Sunan Ibn Mājah
"Every day two angels come down from Heaven and one of them says, 'O Allah! Compensate every person who spends in Your Cause,' and the other (angel) says, 'O Allah! Destroy every miser.'"
Sahih Bukhari
I was born and brought up in a family that my parents had great expectation in my studies. I used to get stereotyped questions like why you didn&8217;t score A+ for all subjects like the neighbor kids. My parents always compared me to neighbour kids, their career, looks, likes etc. In any case, none of us just ever seemed to be good enough. Even If they are telling these all for my growth, I just felt like it&8217;s so unfair to say so all the time. Now the days passed and I am an elderly person now. Now when I look back, there is a different perspective for the things my parents did. There are things I look at and think “did they do that just for us?” When my mum worked as a seamstress for 12 hours a day on very small wages to give us the things we wanted. My perspective as a mum made me to think about why they always held such high standards and why we could never meet them. Now I have children and it made me think about whether I ever put my children in the same position. I don&8217;t like to compare my children to others. All people are born with different values and capabilities and Allah is there to help them in every situations. I consider to love them unconditionally always regardless of what they did. Even if we hadn&8217;t really experienced the unconditional love from our parents, we must know that our children need it. Each of us can feel the unconditional love by giving it to ourselves.
Read MoreMufti Menk answered wisely to a question on how to keep away of quarrels in a joint family especially between husband&8217;s relatives and daughter in law. He says that often a mom or dad cannot love their daughter in law as equal as they love their daughter or son. In Islamic way, we must keep away quarrels and must be united in a family life. The best solution is that to live separately with her husband and children and to visit home in occasions such as Eid, Bakrid etc. Islamically, women deserve a dignity, respect and privacy at home. Living together does not provide unity in Islam. But respecting others will produce unity in Islam.
Read MoreIn the name of God, the Merciful, the Beneficent _O Believers! Fasting is decreed for you as it was decreed for those before you, so that you may remain God-fearing. Fast for a certain number of days. But whoever of you is ill, or on a journey, shall fast, instead of the same number of days later on. Those who find fasting a strain too hard to bear may compensate for it by the feeding of a needy person. He who does good of his own account does himself good thereby, for to fast is to do yourselves good, if you but knew it._ (The Cow, “Al-Baqarah” 2: 183-4) Fasting is a manifestation of man&8217;s determined will and his relationship with his Lord which is based on total submission to Him. It is also a demonstration of man&8217;s deliberate disregard of all his physical needs in order to win Allah&8217;s pleasure. These are necessary elements in the training of the believers so that they are able to bear the hardships of the way they have chosen. On both sides of it, there are all sorts of pleasures and temptations which beckon its travellers, trying to force them off their course. Fasting has numerous advantages for health which continue to be discovered as time passes. It goes without saying that Allah takes into consideration the physical constitution of man. Allah relalizes that man requires help and motivation in order to respond to duty and fulfill it regardless of its benefits. It takes time for man to get used to a certain duty and to be convinced of its wisdom. Hence, the decree of fasting starts with the address made to the believers which reminds them of their essential quality, that is, they believe in Allah. They are then told that fasting has always been a duty required of the believers. Its principal aim is their education and training so that their hearts acquire a high standard of sensitivity and purity and that the fear of Allah is well established in them: “Believers, fasting is decreed for you as it was decreed for those before you, so that you may remain God-fearing.” Fear of Allah To fear Allah, then, is the great aim of fasting which looms large before our eyes. As the believers fulfill this duty, in total obedience of Allah and in pursuit of His pleasure, they feel the quality of fearing Allah to be a life within them. This is indeed the quality which guards their hearts against spoiling their fasting by indulging in sin, even if it is of the type which only passes through the mind. Those who are addressed by the Quran are fully aware of the value Allah attaches to this quality of fearing Allah and being conscious of Him. Its acquirement is something for which they yearn. Fasting is a tool with which it is achieved. Hence, the Quran raises it before them as a noble objective. Allah Wishes to Make Things Easy They are then told that fasting is prescribed only for a certain number of days. Exempted from it, however, are the sick until they have recovered, and the travellers until they have settled: “Fast a certain number of days. But whoever of you is sick, or on journey, shall fast instead the same number of days later on.” Taken at its face value, the statement concerning the exemption of the sick and the travellers is general, unrestricted. Hence any illness or journey is a good reason for exemption from fasting, provided that compensatory fasts are held when those reasons no longer obtain. The purpose of the exemption is that it is Allah&8217;s wish to make things easy, not hard, for man. We cannot claim to have full knowledge of the divine wisdom behind relating this exemption to sickness and travelling generally. There may be some hardships which may not immediately appear to us or we may tend to overlook. Since Allah has not attached this exemption to any particular reason, we refrain from making any judgment concerning it. We obey any statement Allah has made, even if its wisdom does not appear immediately to us. What is certain is that there is a wisdom behind it, whether we recognize it or not. Using the Concessions Some people may fear that such an opinion may cause people to neglect their worship for any reason indeed, this is what has prompted Islamic scholars to adopt a more strict attitude and to lay down conditions. Islam does not compel people to be obedient. Its method is to implant in them the consciousness of Allah so that they obey Him. The acquisition of the quality of fearing Allah is the particular aim of this worship. He who tries to use a certain concession made by Allah in order to evade fulfilling a duty is, in the first place, devoid of goodness. With such an attitude, the aim behind the religious duty cannot be fulfilled. We must not forget that Islam is a religion laid down by Allah. Allah knows best that this religion achieves a perfect balance between the relaxation of certain duties and strict adherence to duty. A certain concession may serve a certain interest which cannot be served otherwise. Indeed, this must be the case. Hence, the Prophet has ordered Muslims to make use of the concession Allah has allowed them. As for the exemption from fasting in cases of illness, it appears that the exemption applies to every case which may be reasonably described as illness, regardless of its nature or intensity. It is compulsory for anyone who makes use of exemption to compensate for the days of Ramadan for which he missed the fasting due to illness or travelling. Each day is compensated for by fasting one day any time during the year.
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