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Pleasurable Parenting: Flexible Reward Chart

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Date: February 12, 2015

Umm Salihah Ahmed, a blog writer and a loving mother tells about a flexible reward chart on pleasurable parenting. The content of the blog can be read in an abridged format as follows:  Children are the focus of our life and we are all on the way to parent them in the best lovable and pleasurable way. She is a compassionate devotee of Islam religion and believes that children are the blessings of Allah and thus we have to treat them in a divine way. Just wipe out the feelings of stress, worries, guilty and cruelty and to start dedicating our life to parent our children. We have to understand the faults of our children, so that we can correct them timely. At the same time we can celebrate their strengths, be gentle in the way we guide them and recognise when the right way to discipline requires a loving approach that tries to identify why a child might be rebelling rather than punishment. The best way to have a good parent is to agree with the qualities of our children first and to lead them to a positive approach to life. By accepting the continuous request from her kids, she has prepared a reward chart for them. The chart incorporated nine broad blogcategories of activity that could generate a reward (or merit) and each child had a different coloured dot to identify who did something good. She also added a bar across the top to show weeks from now to the end of the year.

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Motherhood and Anxieties: A Comment on Hitting

This is a blog by a mother about her child’s behaviour at school and her reply to the child to make him the best boy in the world. The incident was all about her child Gorgeous’ trouble making at school by hitting the toilet door while two boys were found together inside the toilet. She realized that best to steer or discipline my children when necessary using reasoning or by displaying anger in a non-violent manner, rather than by hitting. She says that hitting is not the most constructive way to parent and can lead to children expressing their own anger in inappropriate ways such as hitting others and not knowing how to express their frustration appropriately as adults. She also reminds that gentleness with children is part of the sunnah of our beloved Prophet. Now a days the news media channels are continuously streaming stories on child abuse related to sexting and pornography. The government indicates that the development of children is being impacted by an increasingly sexualised environment. Wiping out this bad environment is out of sight. But we can lead our kids in the protected environment with our guidance and affection. And this is a message to all the mothers in this world that moms are the best of their children so that they can share the things or events which hurt them from anywhere and she can cure their wounds of bad feelings.

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Umrah Pilgrimage: An ever memorable gift from my parents

The author Jameel Syed expresses his experience in Umrah that he witnessed while his pilgrimage. He says nobody can walk empty handed from this place of purification. He first visited Umrah in the month of Ramadan in 1998. The pilgrimage journey was a gift from his parents for graduating from the University of Michigan. Pilgrims chanted loud and loud as they moved closer to the object of desire. His heart beats started to beat faster and faster when he reaches the place of Allah. His eyes started to fill with tears and while walking towards the object of desire he was in a dreamy state. Finally he stopped and he knew that he was in the presence of majesty. People come from far and near to have their prayers heard. Different people believes in Islam with different skin colors eat different foods, speak different languages, wear different clothes and practice different customs all gathered in one place to celebrate peace, brotherhood and unity. The pilgrimage places like Mecca and Madinah have their own flavors. Both cities carry the wonderful air of devotion and humanity and both are complimentary to one another. Both cities make you feel safe and privileged. While the trip to Madinah, he could meet many notable personalities who are working for Islam and its teachings. Qalam Institute, Ustadh Wissam Sharieff, Imam Dawood Yasin, Imam Khalid Latif, imam Omer Bajwa, Ustadh Jameel Besada were some among them. The ever loving and memorable thing that the author could do was being given the permission to raise the adhan in two masajid of the holy city: Darul Hadith and the famed Islamic University of Madinah. Since this greatest thing happened, he believes that nobody can walk away from this place empty handed.

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Kusoof us Shams (Solar Eclipse): A time to Raise the Praise of Allah, the Exalted

Earth and moon while rotating around their own axes rotate in their own orbits around sun and earth, respectively. In doing so there comes a time when moon orbits in between sun and the earth that blocks a part to complete visibility of sun from earth. This blockage of sun is simply called as solar eclipse. This year on August 21, 2017 partial to total solar eclipse will last about three hours in USA. In Greater Washington Area partial solar eclipse could be observed between 1:17 to 4:01 PM. For details please refer to NASA (https://eclipse2017.nasa.gov) or other online resources. Hadith relative to Kusoof us Shams (Solar Eclipse) It so happened that on a day of a solar eclipse our beloved Prophet Mohammad, SAW, lost his young son Ibrahim. And the people thought that the solar eclipse took place due to the death of Ibrahim. This thinking was carried from the days of Jahilia in Arabia. The Prophet, SAW immediately denied such notion by saying:  "The sun and the moon are two signs of the signs of Allah, SWT; they do not eclipse on the death or life of anyone. So, when you see the eclipse, remember Allah, SWT, raise His Praise, His Greatness (say Takbir), pray, and give charity." (Narrated by the Prophet's wife Ayesha, RAA).  He then, himself observed prayers and supplication that was joined by some companions.  Salatul Kusoof us Shams (Solar Eclipse) Prayer It is generally accepted among the scholars of Islam that the two rakah Sunna that Prophet, SAW observed is Sunnah (stressed) and must be observed by every Muslim and Muslimah. There are two ways to observe this prayer as described below: 1. Pray two rakat sunnah as usual following the standard procedure but recite long Surahs (longest in first rakah) in both rakah after Surah Fatiha. Observe each action lot longer than usual prayers by increased Tasbeeh. 2. Pray two rakat sunnah with two added ruku (one in each rakah). In the first rakah after reciting Surah Fatiha and a long Surah (recommended is equal to Surah Baqara) then go into long ruku and stay there lot longer than the standard ruku. Then go back to standing position, recite again Surah Fatiha and a long Surah (shorter than the one recited in first), follow with a long ruku and then complete the standing and two long prostrations. This completes the first rakah with two ruku. Folllow the second rakah with two ruku and two sujood as first.  3. After completion of the prayers supplicate whole heatedly asking Allah, SWT's help in affairs of ourselves, our beloved ones, our community, our nation as a whole. Ask His direct protection from all the evils and ills of this world and our own selves.  4. This prayer should be observed covering the whole solar eclipse time, if possible. But, neither before nor after the eclipse time.  5. If an obligatory prayer time is close then Kusoof should be delayed and observed after the obligatory prayer.  6. It could be prayed in congregation in a mosque (preferred) or individually in a mosque or home.

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